Monday October 27, 2025 AM

 

Another fucking bad night, I don’t know what is triggering me to  shitty nights like these but I really don’t know that must be for this time of hear to be honest.  Winter, spring and summer I sleep soundly but autumn oh no!  I don’t know why but this time of year I can’t freaking sleep.  It is rather annoying to be honest with you, and I have my sleeping song on, but alas I can’t sleep.  I am glad that my smart watch was on me as it would give me sweet hell!  Time and time again during autumn (as much as I love it) I cannot sleep.  I don’t know what is causing this but there is something that doesn’t let me sleep during the late fall!    I don’t know if this is because of the fucking veil thinning but I am getting a big whiff if that.  Personally I could not sleep at this time of year for that reason!  Why you ask, I am very sensitive at this time of fucking year.   Well, this was always like that….for the most part of I have past life flashbacks or experiences.   These are like your typical PTSD flashbacks back but instead of being from your current life they are from other more past lives or rebirths.  I had my first experience at age five when I was about five or six!  What happened was my mother and father took me to a Chinese restaurant and I - out of no where - had a fucking fit.  Right after we left the images of east turkestan and the Uighurs showed up in my head out of nowhere where, the images were urging the Han dynasty…which, at five i could not comprehend at all!

The imagines of a nice garden in north western china kept popping up in my head for month since.  Know I must say this was most unusual for me at that time as I never understood who the hell my ancestors where or where the hell I am came from, I was five and I was just in kindergarten.  That was at spring - another time when that fucker of a veil thins!

It thins twice a year, spring and fall.  That being said may 31rst is not a picnic for me either.    The reason is earth as two hemispheres and what will spring this side will be Samhain on the next.   So it thins twice from what I understand. I never really like that veil.

Quite a few years ago……i had been watching a show on my ancestors and end up having what seemed like a flashback of sorts and was plagued with memories of a different time and place, ancient Tibet.  That was interesting to see that some one loved me but it was nit so interesting to see them die!  That being said I have wrote a whole blog on tumblr about it! And try to out in on the watty’s as a story because it was needed to be told!  I will try for the ambys next year with that but any way this is a fun but horrid time if year for me.

Also less then two or three years ago a demon poppped out from under my bed!  Rather annoying and frightening to be honest with you!  I know these things  are very frightening and they are but I personally find them annoying and traumatic, that happened on the witching hour 3 o’clock!  The fact that ever fucking time I wake up is 3 in the morning is rather annoying!  This is a very dangerous time to walk up any old time of year but during this time of year it’s rather dangerous as you could be taken over by a demon!  Though I am not really afraid of them being up this early cannot be great for my fucking mood!  That being it is four o’clock so I will try to get some sleep right now.  But the prognosis for this night is grim as far as sleep is concerned!